“Seeing a counselor is just for psychos.”
“Asking for help is a sign of weakness. I should be able to handle this myself.”
“I will just talk to my family. It’s shameful to share these personal problems with other people.”
These are just some of the common negative perceptions people have about seeking professional help for problems. Can the Filipino benefit from professional counseling?
While we may have a better support system from family and friends compared to people in Western societies, there are still many occasions when Filipinos can gain opportunities to grow by seeing a psychotherapist:
- when there is a sense of shame about the problem, such as moral or professional failure
- when there is fear of judgment, criticism or personal repercussions
- when the problem is about family members or friends
- when the person wants an unbiased opinion
- when there is concern that the other person will not take it well, or will reveal the information to others
When a troubled person consults someone he knows, he has to consider how the other person will react to his issues. For example, he may not want to share his fears about being laid off to his family, because he does not want them to worry. Or he will not complain to his friends about his wife because he does not want to malign the reputation of his wife. Consulting a third-party frees the troubled person from that burden.
Many people go for counseling because they have broken or dysfunctional families who cannot give them the emotional support they need. There are people who live far from their families or have OFW parents. There are people who are shy and do not have the courage to open up to friends. There are people who want to appear strong and mature to everyone, and so refuse to share their vulnerabilities to friends.
It is true that there is generally a social stigma associated with psychotherapy. But this does not negate the need for people who are troubled to seek professional counseling.
Some companies maintain Employee Assistance Programs (EAP) as part of their Wellness Program or HR benefits. The EAP gives employees access to professional counselling without the stigma, without the trouble of having to look for a competent counselor themselves and without the added financial burden. Does your company have an EAP?
